Filed under: Life, School, Uncategorized | Tags: 'before', knee appointment, work
I have maaajor work to do. But because I’m a ridiculous procrastinator, I have to give myself set time limits to get things done. It’s generally 1hr work / half hour break, but I just ate dinner so I gave myself a good 45 minutes. It probly seems ridiculous but it really does keep me on track. And I have ALOT of work to do, so what ever.
I’m going to an appointment tomorrow to finally figure out what the hell is wrong with my leg. <3 Thank god. I’m really really hoping that I don’t need surgery and just alot of physical therapy. But idk, we’ll see tomorrow I guess.
Alright this is out of nowhere, but I thought about it a while now. Why is it that if something is ‘before’ it can be in front of you or behind you? Like “it lies before you” or “it was before your time.” Idk, here’s so many different purposes that a single word in the English language can serve.
But I have to get back to my work now :/ Laterrr!
I actually love that new song by Christina Aguilera ^ But the title ironically works with the content of this post.
So here’s the deal: I’m basically crippled.
Well, not really. I just can’t use my left leg. :\
This is how it all happened, it was two days ago at our first Notre Dame game of the year. It’s a pretty big deal because NDA girls are pretty much the Nazi’s of field hockey. Varsity tied them, and yeah it wasn’t a win, but it might as well been. The coach was ecstatic. ANYWAY, after that JV started. The first half NDA scored a goal. Yeah, it was a bummer but we were actually doing really well so no one had any hard feelings. We were all pretty pumped actually. Second half started, offense was doing really good, the ball was on NDA’s half for the majority of the time. Ten minutes into the half the ball comes into my range, defense, so obviously I go for it. It went past me so I was chasing the girl with the ball in the opposite direction and just as I get up to her, CRACK. I’m on the ground. To tell you the truth, the pain wasn’t even that bad. But the shock was incredible. It was like it was pain, but it was identifiable. It didn’t feel like any kind of pain I’ve ever known. It wasn’t the stub your knee kind of pain, or the scrape your elbow kind of ouch. It was like of you even put your focus on it for a matter of three seconds it was unbearable. It was almost as if my leg was on fire and being electrocuted and numb at the same time. It was so weird. So, the ref and my coach came up and everyone crowded around me to see if I was okay. I distinctly remember the girl I was going against asking me if I was alright. I don’t think anyone thought that it was THAT bad, but they still took me out, carried me to the side, and gave me an ice pack. I sat there with Michaela’s mom and watched the game, cheering on the girls. I’m actually wicked proud of my team, I’m not even gonna lie. They did so good. We lost 0-1, but we all knew that it was such an improvement from last year. It really was a good game.
So Jen, Michaela’s mom, gave me a ride home. We had dinner company so my mom really didn’t want to bring me to the hospital, I swear she thought I was being dramatic. She kept asking if it “really hurt that bad” and was trying to bribe me into just going in the morning and missing school. But I insisted that we go to the hospital. So we were in the waiting room in the ER for like three hours total, I got checked in and what not. Then I got a room finally and a woman came and started touching my knee and bending it and asking different questions. She gave me some apple juice for the ibuprofen I was going to take later on, and I waited to get x rays. The person who xrayed me actually had played field hockey too, back in the day. So once the x rays were all done I went back into my room and a few minutes later the same lady came in and showed me a picture of my leg. Apparently I chipped my bone (the crack) and I possibly tore my ACL or some other ligament. Oh, and it’s my left leg too, Tom Brady style ;) So they gave me a huge leg brace and crutches and sent me on my way. I have an appointment with an orthopedic doctor on Tuesday for further examination. My nurse suggested that I wait the weekend so that the swelling can go down and they’ll be able to get a better look at it.
So I went to school the next day and had to tell people what happened literally 500 times and my entire body is incredibly sore because I have to depend on it so much more. And yeah. It sucks. Most likely, I’m out for the rest of the season which really upsets me. But hopefully I’ll be playing in the Spring.
my leg brace
my knee & the face I drew on it haha -*you can’t really tell from the picture that it’s that swollen, but literally I can’t even find my knee cap. Jonny was feeling it and he was like “oh there’s padding in there?” And I was like “no, it’s just THAT swollen.” It’s pretty bad. hahah
Oh! and I guess Laura could hear the crack before I went down hahaha
Filed under: Life
I am tired, sore, cold, and grumpy. I had a game earlier, so it’s understandable, but I don’t like being like this, it tends to make me focus on the things I’m unhappy with in my life. I also don’t like venting to people when I know they have much better things to do, but venting just feels so damn good. So I’ll try to get some of it out on here? The sucky thing about it is I can’t be too specific with some things because I prefer to keep my posts unprivate. And I’m not really feelin’ the whole put-your-business-on-the-internet-for-the-world-to-see kinda deal. I mean props to people who have the guts to do that, but I like to keep things a little more personal.
So lately I’ve been really busy with FH and school which I’ve already mentioned in other posts and whatnot. But it’s just so consuming you know? In a sense I feel that it’s really affecting relationships in my life. Aka, I have no time to maintain them. Honestly, some I really wonder what shape they’ll be in by this time next year. I don’t like this whole idea, the concept of people falling apart, or falling together, or in more general terms, change. I have a real hard time dealing with it.
Today I felt really off. I don’t know what it is. Have you ever gotten the feeling like there’s this whole world but somehow you’re stuck on the outside of it all, just watching. Or like you’re a part of something but you have no specific place? There’s all these people surrounding me and it’s not that I don’t get along with them or that I can’t hold a conversation with them, I just don’t stick you know? It sounds to cliche teenager but I just don’t feel like I fit. I don’t mean like I don’t fit in, I’m creepo of the classroom that collects pokemom cards and bathes once a week (sorrr, anyone that’s like that o_O) hahah. I am comfortable in school and with who I am. I just don’t feel like I connect to anyone and in all honesty I’m really kind of lonely. It’s a terrible feeling. There’s like a void in my life you know? God, I sound so stupid I’m sure. I just don’t know how to explain this without soundng like a complete tool. Then again, it may just be one of those days.
Side track: I don’t know, but the song “When You Believe” by David Archuleta (well, that’s the version I was just listening to, there’s a few others.) always makes me cry. I like can’t even attempt to not cry. The tears just come pouring out haha. It’s like Disney stat too. It’s really not even sad. Idk haha. But I’m out for tonight. Like I said, I’m wicked tired.
Honestly, I don’t care about what anyone says, I love Britney Spears. I understand that she has made some wrong turns in her life. I understand that she’s not the most talented or intelligent or beautiful person in the world. But who in their right mind can say that they have never made a mistake in their life? I mean sure, maybe her bottoming out seems a little more extreme than yours, or your neighbor’s, or the guy’s down the street, but yanno maybe your mistakes would seem a little more catastrophic had you had the world at your fingertips. You hit harder when you fall higher. Plus, everyone has skeletons in their closet. It’s not Britney’s fault that the entire world is infatuated with every step she takes. How would you like it if some one documented the worst time of your life and made it into a big ol’ scrapbook to show MILLIONS of people? Not so great huh? Just because we’re used to seeing Britney like this or like this doesn’t mean she’s not allowed to look like this. What? Because her body isn’t perfect like every other hollywood glamour girl she’s automatically tragically overweight? Uhm newsflash, we’re basically ALL overweight compared to hollywood. Her body isn’t fat, it’s normal. I’d like the entire world criticizing how she looks to try and drop twenty pounds and then call her fat. & Honestly, would you want someone to see you and take pictures of you when youre not looking your absolute best? Oh, and then send them out to People magazine and Us Weekly? Nahh, didn’t think so :\ I mean i’m really gonna have to side with Chris on this one. Leave Britney alone.
Filed under: Life, School, Shopping | Tags: field hockey, Labor day weekend, Pre AP
So I know that I haven’t been on lately, and my last few posts have been kind of blah, but I’ve just been so busy. Obviously school’s started up again so with field hockey and the pre-AP U.S. History class I’m taking, I’ve been completely swamped. I feel silly talking about the class but I really have my hands full with it. It’s unbelievable, but I guess it’s all worth it right? I hear that the class i’m in (mostly because of the teacher,) is at the same level of difficulty as the actual AP class, or maybe even harder. Hopefully when I actually take AP History it’ll be a breeze then. I actually shouldn’t even be on here now, I’m in the middle of working on some history assignments at the moment. But I kinda have been wanting to get on here and do something other than research or typing up an essay.
Field Hockey, well that’s a whole other story. The practices really haven’t been bad, or as bad as I expected them to be. We have a new coach this year aswell, Mr. Angers. I do miss our old coaches Alli and Erin but I have to admit there are a few things about Mr. Angers’ coaching that I prefer over the old ways. This year there are a ton of sophmores on the team. We did get new freshman and whatever but it’s mainly tenth graders. Next year when varsity loses all of their seniors, JV is going to be seriously lacking in the defensive line. And varsity won’t have it that great either, we’re only going to have four players on defense, meaning none of us are going to get switched out during the game, which will be tough. Tomorrow is our first game, it’s away in Marlboro. I believe that was our first game last season as well. It’s the start of a long eight weeks.
In news other than school and sports, I’ve been pretty good. This past Labor day weekend I went to Blackstone with Michaela, Heather, and Tyler, then headed to a “party” at Jack’s. (It was really just us sitting around a bonfire with a group of immature, over rowdy, boys) on Friday night, a cookout at Heather’s aunt’s on Saturday, watched this video of a skate team scavenger hunt at Eastern Boarder (cuuutest guys there ;D) on Sunday, and spent monday with Jonny at his aunt’s wicked nice house out in Norfolk. It felt good to just relax and get the feeling of summer back a little bit. I went and got my physical today too. I needed it to play this season, so I got it right in time for the first game. I’m really excited about this Friday, I’m going shopping and Jonny and I are going out to eat. I don’t get the chance to go out much so it’s nice to do something like this once in a while. That probably sounds ridiculous with the weekend that I just described, but I really never have plans like that ha. I hang out with people but we just hang out. We usually end up driving or walking around aimlessly for a few hours to kill time before curfew. Ahh, so exciting. haha
But it’s getting late, and I have a ton more reading to do. This class is killing me. :P Night!
